“A single day in your courts is better than a thousand anywhere else! I would rather be a gatekeeper in the house of my God than live the good life in the homes of the wicked.”
Psalms 84:10 NLT
To be in your courts, in your presence is more fulfilling than anything else. Nothing else comes close in comparison! How does this look in my life? In my every day?
Not a spotless house.
Not in laundry done.
Not a clean floor.
Not in dishes done.
Not in calm, well-organized mornings.
Not in happy family dinners.
Not in finished meals.
Not in a cup of coffee or a glass of wine.
Not in Facebook, or Instagram, or the perfect Snapchat filter.
Not in the appropriately sarcastic meme to post.
Not in a life without ADHD.
Not in a life without chromosomal microdeletion disorders.
Not in hung up clothes.
Not in a clean car.
Not in a flat stomach or toned thighs.
Not a checked off to-do list.
Not in a world where I can make everyone happy all the time.
But here, Lord. Here with You.
Breathing and living by Your words.
By Your strength.
By Your peace.
By Your enablement.
By Your love.
By Your grace.
By Your Name.
By Your power.
By praising You.
By thanking You.
By knowing you.
By pressing on to know more (Hosea 6:3)
By reading Your word. (Romans 15:4)
By trusting in You. (2 Corinthians 4:16-17)
By believing in You.
By believing You, that you love me beyond any way that I can imagine, that Your Spirit living in me doesn’t simply hold me up to get me through, but empowers me, enables me, strengthens me.
And comforts me. You hold me up and You hold me.
Maybe my “gatekeeper” position is here, in a messy house filled with loud kids. Do you know what a gatekeeper’s job was? To guard. To keep the good things in place and keep the bad things out. Not glamorous, not the pinnacle of ministry in the temple, but absolutely necessary.
So I didn’t get perfect children (who does?). So what if I am at the point in my life where if I have to choose a good night’s sleep or a clean house, I’m sure going to choose sleep.
And, since we’re being really honest tonight, so what if this wasn’t all what I had planned?
What, Morgan, are you going to do about that?
I’m going to remain in Your courts, remain in Your presence.
I’m going to learn my God-given job as a mom of kids with special needs and plain ol’ regular needs, in all its non-glamourousness.
I’m going to do my best to keep the evil out of this house and nurture the Spirit of the Living God within.
I’m going to screw it up sometimes, but I am going to continue to learn and accept the grace You always extend to me.
God, teach me to remain with You, in Your presence. To meet every activity of my day, whether it be chaotic or peaceful, with Your Spirit to guide me.
Teach me to see what is important to You, not to me.
Teach me to see You in my every day.
Teach me that to remain with You is better than a thousand other “what ifs” and a thousand “anywhere elses.” Teach me to go nowhere else but with You!